Valentines & My Crooked Palm Lines

Our journey through life presents many challenges.  If we find someone to share that journey with, it opens up a totally new perspective and a whole realm of possibilities.  Lucky are those who found someone that they love and share life’s journey with.

Though people say that I don’t look one, I am already five decades old.  And though people say that I am addicted to love, by this time and at this late period of my life, I have started to accept the fact that sharing my journey with someone seem already farfetched and very unlikely.

happy valentines everyone!

If a psychic palm reader would try to peruse the lines on my hand, I guess, he would say that such palm-lines seem crooked and uncommon.   I guess my fate is simply different as compared to the majority. 

It’s Valentine’s day tomorrow and I realized that I am too old to turn crabby or cantankerous.  I have started to accept the thought that sharing life’s journey is not for me.  If such is not for me, then it is not for me.  What is important with my life’s situation now is that I simply follow my heart, I’m living my own truth, I try to enjoy life and I got a beautiful family who cares and loves me.

love rule #1: if it’s not for you, then it’s not for you

Have a sweet and beautiful Valentines everyone!

Ruminations on Ali’s First Birthday Party

Just this weekend, I attended another first birthday party.  That of my grandnephew, Ali.  Ali’s first birthday celebration was a little grand and over-the-top: servers were in costumes; food served was buffet style part of which was a roasted calf; there was a funny magician who performed; the dinosaur-theme set-up was ostentatious; alcoholic drinks as post-party celebration for the adults were overflowing; and, there was even a fantastic fireworks presentation.

happy birthday ali !!!

a colorful fun day!

super fun with friends & relatives

I no longer can recall how many times I have attended a first birthday party in the past.  And consistently, since a one year old baby has no concept of birthdays and parties, the baby-celebrator is clueless and has zero idea why everyone is congregating for such a day. 

It will make you wonder if such celebration was really about the baby or is it really about and for the people that surround him.  I guess, the latter seem to be the correct answer to this question.  It is indeed for and about the people who helped and will help the baby to grow happy and healthy.  And it is most especially for the parents (in Ali’s case my niece Thatcher and nephew-in-law Alexis) who seem to celebrate for not screwing up and being successful in their first year with the cute and adorable child.

a job well done…

The child may have received all the gifts, but it is the parents and the people who surround the celebrant who receives all the hugs, the love, the praises and the encouragements as expressed and delivered by all the guests who attended.

I am pretty sure, Ali’s parents (and like any other parents) had numerous uncertainties and frustrations in the past year.  I am also pretty sure, both Thatcher and Alexis had several worries and anxieties from crying outbursts to bottle rejections.  Some hurdles were conquered by mere luck while others were resolved by experience.  And oftentimes, snags and obstacles were resolved thru the assistance of family or friends.  Thus, the first birthday party of any baby is indeed a salute and celebration for the parents and the people who surrounds the child.

pose of the day

I was given the opportunity to give a short talk during the party.  I was able to give my warmest birthday wishes for the adorable Ali.  I was able to greet a beautiful afternoon to all the attendees. I however, failed to congratulate Ali’s parents.  So let me take this opportunity to express my warmest felicitations and compliments to Thatcher & Alexis for a job well done.

A Beautiful Last Day of 2021

The last day of 2021 was a huge day for me.  It was one day where I got to spend a beautiful New Year’s Eve celebration with my family and at the same time being hopeful for a gorgeous year ahead.  My last day of 2021 even became more beautiful when I got the chance to visit a church so as to do a pint-sized prayer.

After realizing that my family does not have any sparklers to ignite and party poppers to snap during New Year’s Eve, me, Joy (my younger sister) accompanied by our nephew Gabby decided to head outside to purchase ourselves with some inexpensive hand-held “luces” (sparklers) and party poppers.

gabby took this beautiful photo of the church at night time (last night of 2021)

Our hunt for these sparklers enabled us to reach one of the most admired and prayed-upon churches in my country, the National Shrine of Our Mother of Perpetual Help, also known locally as Baclaran church.  Since we were able to luckily purchase our much-needed sparklers and party poppers along the gates of the church, we decided to drop by inside so as to light some candles and say our little prayers.

As usual, I lighted 5 candles. I have the habit of lighting 5 candles each time I have the chance to do it in a church or any grounds intended for prayers.  Let me reserve in my future writing what each candle symbolizes except for one.  One of the candles is an intended prayer for me: my soul, my future, my welfare, my life’s appreciation and of course my sanity. Haha!

joy & I on baclaran church grounds

lighting candles & prayers for everyone

That one candle was also intended for my personal wish in the coming year and that is to be a little sunshine for everyone who I get to encounter, may it be through personal encounter or through my substandard and tawdry writing. 

Happy New Year and may every one of us be a little sunshine to someone this year!

Christmas Without Nengkoy

Last Christmas, like any other Christmases in the past, I woke up late.  I have always considered Christmas Day as my laziest day of the year.  If there would be a day that I would give myself as a gift, it would obviously be the Christmas Day.  It is the day when I would spend inside my bedroom all day – relaxing, slackening and lazy-ing (if the latter is a word).

Part of my respite was to just watch YouTube videos all day and peek at what my social media friends have been posting.  Surprisingly, the first YouTube video that I watched last Christmas made me sob and whimper.

2021 is the first Christmas without Nengkoy, my mom.  That is why my family’s Christmas Eve dinner was totally different for the first time.  Absent was the star of our traditional Noche Buena.  Though the Christmas food was really good, the Nengkoy-flavor was not there which I guess I would have to get used to in the next Christmases to come.

me & nengkoy (my forever star of Noche Buena), christmas 2019

The song is so moving, it made me miss my mother this Christmas.  And though my mom will never be forgotten – she’s part and will always be part of my daily prayer – I guess I need to simply just get used to this kind of a Christmas set-up.

A Businesswoman, a Banker, a College Professor & an IT Manager

This is what happens when a businesswoman, a banker, an IT Manager and a college professor who’s a candidate for PhD do a Christmas dance number.

They call their group, The Wrong Direction (gleaned & predicated from the British group One Direction). And every year, when they are about to end their wacky performance they would shout and ask us, the spectators, “Mabuhay Manila, do you want more!?”.  And every year all of us, their dazed & confused audience, in unison would scream the biggest “NOooo!!”.

Gabby, the IT Manager! He was judged the best performer this year.  Haha!

Holding a talent contest and performing in front of my family during Christmas Eve has been a tradition.   They won the Grand Prize this year amounting to 60 USD.  So, can you just imagine how bad the other groups (my other family members) performed? 

They claim that they won because they were so in unison and perfectly danced like the Korean pop group BTS.  Why did they win?  It was because I was the judge.  Haha!  These businesswoman, banker, college professor and IT manager are my crazy niece & nephews by the way.  One good thing though, they are not working for one company.  After their crazy performance, I had a headache.

Embracing My Beautiful B Day!

My long birthday week has finally been concluded!  My digestive system can finally go back to its usual routine.  Haha!  And despite a protracted pandemic year, let me brag that there are actually two major highlights in my birthday celebration this year.

love this photo!

who wouldn’t do some artsy pictorial in this mansion when the background is the smallest volcano on the planet (taal volcano)?

Organized by my sweet nephews and nieces, I and my whole family spent a wonderful weekend in a mansion of a house in cool & misty Tagaytay province, a high-altitude city 59 kilometers away from the bustling Manila.

Second highlight was the sumptuous dinner buffet in 5-star Sofitel Manila, considered to have the priciest and longest buffet in the country.  My whole family was of course in attendance in this wonderful dinner.

sofitel dinner

I guess I have gone really old and already accepted this fact.  In the past years I tremble and experience anxiety attacks when I know that my birthday is about to come and I actually abhor celebrating it.   I hated getting old.  Haha!  

But this year, I decided to embrace this beautiful day.  I have accepted the fact that I have already lost my youth and the remaining years should be more about the essence of living.  And adopting the thoughts of Mark Twain regarding birthdays and old age, let me end this post by relaying what he said, “Age is a case of mind over matter.  If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

You’ll Gonna See Me Rise!

It’s my birthday week this week and it made me ponder if at my pretty old age I have been “successful”.  But while ruminating about this thought, I question “what is the actual measure of success?”  Is it the accumulated amount of money that you have in your bank account, is it the number of people you meet and developed as friends and colleagues, is it the intensity of one’s joy and happiness, is it the level of spirituality of one’s soul or is it simply the degree of one’s contentment about life.

you’ll gonna see me rise

I have lost my youth more than 20 years ago yet I still struggle to answer this question.  A lot of you I would assume would say that it is a mix of all these stuff that I mentioned.  And I am pretty sure that I will grow old, be outdated and senile yet will never be able to answer this profound question.  But this will not stop me from trying to reach my goals, dreams and aspirations so as to consider myself successful.  No matter how old and late I am in my life, I will not stop for I know that I will rise.

No silly wish this year but let me have a beautiful birthday song instead.  Created by Calum Scott entitled “Rise” is my Birthday Song this year.

Love you all!

Unquantifiable Love

Sixty long years ago a proof of an unquantifiable love was perched.  Sixty long years ago my parents, Nengkoy & Joe got married inside a church.

Nengkoy & Joe sixty years ago.  Happy anniversary Nanay & Tatay!

Today, I realized that my big moments, my little talks and even my silly laughs in the past with Nengkoy & Joe were all unquantifiably special.  I terribly miss both of them.  But June 9 this year is more than special.  It is because it is the first year that this gorgeous couple are celebrating their wedding anniversary together in a stunningly beautiful place called Heaven. 

Nengkoy & Joe may no longer be here but knowing that they are finally together gives me peace.  Nengkoy & Joe may no longer be here but they were my proofs that unquantifiable love does exist.  Nengkoy & Joe may no longer be here yet my unquantifiable love for these two beautiful souls will forever persist. 

Sizzling Hot Covid19 Vaccine

My post Covid19 pandemic started yesterday.  When me and my sister (being registered under our local government’s waiting list) were told that an available vaccine is available, we immediately drove up to the designated vaccination site.

Though it is sad to note that majority of my country’s populace still doubts the significance and efficacy of the vaccine, such popular yet imprudent viewpoint became advantageous on my part for getting the vaccine. 

If you’re reading this article and wonder why such meek and lowly event of getting my first jab seem such a big deal on my part, please understand that my poor unregimented country has very limited supply of the vaccine.  It is because my country at this late point in time only depends on the United Nation’s donations as well as the dole-outs sent to us by rich countries because they either have surplus of the vaccines or that their country already achieved the so-called herd immunity.

So how did my first vaccination affair went? Answer: It was hilarious, uneasy and at the same time a little nerve-wracking.  It was nerve-wracking because I hate injections! It was uneasy because the vaccination site was at an open-air public place.  With no air-conditioning and with the scorching humid heat index of 42 degrees Celsius (no thanks to climate change), me and my sister were soaked wet in our very own sweat! 

Good thing there were very few people at the venue, our papers were right away processed.   And after we were injected, the hilarious thing that happened is that both me and my sister were told to stay a little longer because both our blood pressures were shooting up! And when asked if I take medicine for high blood pressure, I answered yes.  When asked what medicine, instead of telling the name of the drug (Losartan), I uttered the name of a popular French bakeshop here in Manila (Lartizan)! LOL!

took a photo of my covid19 vaccine passport while waiting for my boiling blood pressure to ease down! beside it is my sister’s japanese fan.  underneath is a mini-towel to wipe off my super sweat!

With pocket-sized feelings of worry, me and my sister laughed instead after realizing that we were the only two who were asked to stay longer.  My sister even verbalized to the medical team present that who on earth would have a normal blood pressure at such a torrid and scorching temperature?!  After taking our blood pressure three times at an interval of every 15 minutes, both of us were finally released and discharged by the nurses.

I went home nauseous not because of the vaccine but because of the sizzling weather. I too was craving for Lartizan! 

I’m Pretty Sure Nengkoy Is Smiling

It is exactly one month today and the weeks before that was the darkest, saddest and most sorrowful period of my life.  I never imagined that the circumstances of those fretful, flustered and worrisome weeks could be felt and experienced by a human being.  I was helpless, unhappy and perturbed.  Exactly one month today was when my beautiful, charming and loving mother passed away.

This is the reason that I have suspended my posting on this blog.  It is in fact taking me a lot of guts and audacity right now in trying to write and finish this post.  There was even a period in the past weeks that I have decided to end and cease posting writeups on this blog (named after my mom’s endearing nickname, Nengkoy).  But my mother for sure would not want that.

Nengkoy: March 03, 1937 – April 16, 2021

I decided to resume writing because I know I’ve got lots of beautiful stories to tell especially tales and snippets on how lovely and delightful a human being my mother was.  I know that my simple quiet life will never be the same now that my mom is gone.  But I will try my very best to adapt and get by in this new life’s setup.

I know that my mom is watching and got the best view up there in heaven.  And I am pretty sure that she is smiling now that I have resumed my silly writing.